


salt the earth

by alineppenhallow



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode Related, Gen, Grieving Magnus Bane, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Missing Scene, Spoilers S02E04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-19
Updated: 2017-07-19
Packaged: 2018-12-04 06:08:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11549097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alineppenhallow/pseuds/alineppenhallow
Summary: “Where is she?” Raphael demands icily, his voice quiet as he looms over Magnus in his chair.





	salt the earth

**Author's Note:**

> what happened after raphael and simon realised that magnus had sent them on a wild goose chase

Raphael unsurprisingly storms into the loft, the door crashing into the wall and staying there, it’s handle caught in the spiderweb cracks made in the plaster. Magnus doesn’t even flinch. He sips at his scotch, the movement mechanical and timed like a clockwork doll.

“Where is she?” Raphael demands icily, his voice quiet as he looms over Magnus in his chair. He’s about ready to lose it, vibrating in his skin, nostrils flaring as he struggles to hold back the anger.

“Idris’ Tanning Salon,” Magnus says, his usual fanciful flair failing. Like a three day old balloon at a party that bounces along the floor, it’s just a melancholy sight rather than anything resembling the previous joyful demeanor.

Raphael looks taken aback, like he’d thought Magnus would let him down. Considering the hold Camille had on Magnus, he can’t blame Raphael for his doubts. The decades of back and forth and back and forth and now the way his gut burns as he fights the instinct to go and rescue her. Even now. After everything, after putting Raphael’s life on the line. Her presence still lingers, heavy on his back as she whispers sweetly in his ear.

Magnus doesn’t think he has any right to the sliver of hurt Raphael’s flinch causes. He knows his own weakness has let her in time and time again when he should have closed that door long ago. But it’s difficult to let go. Especially when he can’t truly escape her, immortals have the unfortunate habit of sticking around and the world isn’t all that big. She’ll be back again one day, whispering sweet nothings and empty promises in his ear and Magnus doesn’t think he’ll ever have the strength to turn her away.

A part of him wishes the Clave kills her. Just to be free of her.

A weaker part wonders if she’s right, if she’s the only one who’ll ever truly remain with him.

He misses Ragnor.

Ragnor would have known what to do. He would have filled his glass, held him up when he couldn’t do it himself and would have sent Camille to Idris with a gag. He’d have stood at Magnus’ side and ignored that they’d trussed up Magnus’ ex and shipped her off in favour of a long winded argument about who discovered something first. A competition designed to keep Magnus’ mind from darker subjects that always worked.

Ragnor was his friend. He was the type to make plans centuries in advance with Magnus in mind… they were supposed to walk the Nile together next century. He’d been inspired by a recent show and Ragnor had penned it in for later.

_Later_ isn’t coming anymore.

Ragnor was supposed to be there, always. The _but_ to Camille’s seductive claim on his immortality. He was the steel at Magnus’ back, solid and sure and without him, Magnus is… _struggling_.

And now with Camille gone…He’s not even sure if he **can** count today as a victory.

It just feels empty.

“She’s really gone?” Simon asks. Magnus’ gaze flicks to the boy, he’s hovering just on the edge of the door hunched in on himself as he nervously peers around the wall like Camille’s going to jump out and yell ‘boo!’ any second.

“Yes, Idris has their oath breaker now. I doubt we’ll see her again,” Magnus promises rising to his feet with an effortless move. Raphael throws him a look born of decades old disbelief. She’s like a cockroach most of the time, always coming back just when you think you’ve gotten rid of her for good. But Simon doesn’t know that, _yet_ , the empty promise helps loosen him out a little.

Maybe it won’t actually be empty this time.

Magnus sips his scotch again.  

“You’re an idiot,” Raphael tells him.

“Did Catarina fuss over you again?” Magnus asks trying to throw his usual energy into the tease. It works for the most part but Raphael knows him too well and isn’t fooled.

“You didn’t have to face her alone,” Raphael says softly.

“Maybe not,” Magnus says with a smile that doesn’t touch his eyes, he doesn’t agree. If he can, he will always spare Raphael any pain. The harsh scar on Raphael’s cheek is an ugly reminder of his failure to protect Raphael. There was no way he was going to inflict Camille’s manipulations on Raphael. Her favoured form of torture leaves deeper wounds. Putting Raphael and Simon in her path would have been like blood in the water, she’d have sniffed out their weakness’ as much as Magnus’ and ripped into them, twisting just right to inflict the most damage. No, Magnus wasn’t going to let them face her.

He’d shield them as much as possible, even if it cost _him_.

Simon stops fiddling with his phone, his way of giving them space without moving to far from the safety of the makeshift family he’s become apart of, and winces, “Uh, guys. I gotta go, something’s happened with Clary.”

Raphael rolls his eyes so hard his head follows. Magnus is a little more sympathetic, “Go, call if I’m needed.”

“Will do,” Simon promises. He pauses mid-wave goodbye, thinking better of it and dashes forward wrapping Magnus in a surprise hug that’s just a touch too tight to be comfortable. Magnus can’t move, too stunned by the physical affection. Eventually he relaxes when it becomes apparent that Simon in his stubbornness, isn’t going to let go until Magnus accepts the comfort he’s offering. He pats Simon on the back softly and Simon sighs against his chest, relaxing himself. It’s not the best hug in the world, Simon weirdly hunched with his hands resting awkwardly on Magnus’ shoulder blades while Magnus grips his glass and gently pets at Simon’s back as best he can with both arms trapped. Not the best but it eases something in Magnus’ chest.

Another long minute passes before Simon releases him, stepping back and almost tripping over his own feet. Magnus and Raphael both dart forward to right him before he winds up on the floor.

“Ok, so, now I really have to go, later,” Simon declares cheerily before sobering a little, “And uh, thanks Magnus. For everything.”

“You’re welcome, give my love to biscuit, hopefully the crisis is manageable,” Magnus wishes, ignoring the gratitude. He doesn’t know what to do with it anyway.  

“Yeah, knock on wood,” Simon chuckles and in a blur, he’s gone.

“Dios ayudanos…” Raphael mutters as stares after Simon. Magnus snorts into his glass.

“Play nice with your clan mates,” Magnus teases.

“He’s banned,” Raphael deadpans in response.

“He needs the clan and you can hardly blame him for wanting to help his friend,” Magnus argues. The look Raphael gives him says that _he can blame Simon_ and _he will,_ probably for a good while yet. With Camille taken care of though, he might soften to Simon’s predicament a little more.

Magnus decides to leave it for now though, pushing Raphael will only make him stubborn on the subject.

“Magnus…” Raphael starts and Magnus knows what’s coming and he really doesn’t want to poke at that open wound.

Camille has occupied his thoughts enough for one day and he doesn’t want to waste anymore time on her. Maybe it’s cowardly but the problem can wait until tomorrow, just this once. Magnus deserves a break.

“Not tonight my boy,” Magnus begs quietly. Weaving around Raphael to make himself at home on the sofa. Raphael watches him and looks like he’s about to fight him on the subject. Magnus sinks into the cushions, bracing himself for the difficult discussion. Raphael catches the movement and must see something in Magnus’ eyes because he shakes his head and walks over to the drinks table.

“That year is terrible,” Raphael comments, sneering at the bottle’s label.

“You and you’re terrible taste are disowned,” Magnus claims. Raphael snorts and pours himself a generous amount. He wanders over and sinks down beside Magnus on the sofa, leaving no space between them.

“Don’t you have a Clan to return to?” Magnus asks as Raphael makes himself comfortable.

“They can keep, I’m staying,” Raphael states, sipping his scotch and pulling a face at the taste.

_If only_ …Magnus thought to himself sadly. He pats Raphael’s knee and ignores the aching abyss that hovers ahead of him. 

**Author's Note:**

> [Tumblr](https://alineppenhallow.tumblr.com) & [Twitter](https://twitter.com/alineppenhallow)  
> 


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